A brain called Rafaela

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9:37am

Sunday, july 12, 2004

I woke up early thinking about what to write in a new blog, this new page I’ve just created. I thought in pleasing many, in destroying a few; all in vain.

Before that, I had a hard time to sleep, I got dizzy and even fell to the bed.

I made a bitter tea, those you drink to remove all kind of evils, even the ones in the soul. I light up a cigarette that I haven’t smoke in a long time due to the recent principle of pneumonia. “This is not right and neither is healthy”, I thought. I looked those ashes being swallowed in the wind at the same time I was belching its black smoke …  And I could see faces through those polluted mists.

I started doodling. I scribbled in everything. I drew in the walls of my yard, the floor near the washing machine, my empty mattress, and as I no longer had what to stain, I started drawing on my body and when I realized, it was early morning, I got dressed and went to my morning walk.

There I found the leaves dancing and that delicious smell of nature. I started running. I ran so, so hard… Actually I was running from me.

 

Text published in “O diário idiota de Rafaela” – Gabriella Lima, 2011.

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